Welcome to our newsletter...in it we have information, articles, events to help you propel your business forward. I am really excited about adopting this new format for my newsletter and hope that you like what it's all about.

February 2008

Welcome to our mid-winter edition...the good news is the days are getting longer and yes...baseball spring training starts soon...

This edition we have 2 articles and a motivational video...so enjoy the February edition...it's a little more heart centred this month for Valentines Day!

David

The good news is there is always hope if you just stick with it. So, what do I mean? Well...I have to be honest with you...for years I have not had contact with my daughter...she lives outside of the city with her mom, step father and half sisters...in fact her mom and didn't even talk...we couldn't...we're like oil and water...they just don't mix.

So one of the more painful aspects of my life was this lousy relationship I had with my ex-wife and my daughter. I planned things out, I thought about how I would overcome and win, I prayed for a reunion, I saw a psychic once a year and would ask her about it...and you know what? No matter what I did...I wasn't going to re-establish that relationship.

Here's the lesson, stop out-thinking the situation and just allow life and nature to run it's course.

I have not seen or spoken to my daughter for almost 4 years. Nothing, she wanted nothing to do with me...and it's not that I am some bad guy...it's just that her perception was that I was.

Now back last November...November 2006...I get a call on birthday of all days, that m daughters step father wants to meet me with me to discuss some matters about her. I know what you're thinking as you read this...the same thing I thought when I got that call. "What the heck...why are you calling me today on my day to talk about some issues...couldn't it wait".

Well it did. For 3 weeks. We finally met and had coffee to talk about the fact that my 12 year old daughter and soon to be 13...(a teenager) felt awkward at school and wanted to blend in more by changing her name and being adopted. She had my last name and wanted to have his (her step-fathers).

Wow! I thought and you called me about this on my birthday? What kind of a gift was that? I thought.

So after being in my head about it and thinking I could control the situation...wanting to get my daughter to see things my way and not agreeing so fast...I somehow severed the relationship again...that was in December of 2006.

After my tactics kind of backfired...I let things go. Then in March, I got the adoption papers from the lawyers. I sat on them for a month. I didn't do a thing. I didn't know what to do. Was I to sign them and just walk away never to see my daughter again?

I didn't have a relationship anyway right?

But...what happened is I got into action thankfully due to a personal development program I was involved with as a coach. (Landmark Education http://www.landmarkeducation.com/ ) and I faced my fear...and thought...if I am going to lose my daughter then I want a meeting with her prior to me just signing the papers. I was going to agree to allowing the adoption, but I wanted her to know that I was committed to be there for her, that I loved her and that I wanted to re-establish a relationship. I wasn't just going to sign and walk away...I wanted a meeting. I wanted some assurances I could talk to her once in a while and even visit too...I felt that I should be in her life and she deserved that in the long run!

Well by mid April, that was my stance. I did not sign any papers and in fact requested what I wanted to have happen.

Fast forward to October of 2007 and the meeting with my daughter, my ex-wife, her new step dad and the lawyers was set.

It was set for Saturday November 3rd...one day before my birthday. It's all fitting isn't it?

I met my daughter for the first time in 3 and a half years that day and wow...she's awesome. I told her how I felt and why I was signing. I was signing for her to be happy and that I wanted to resume on some level our relationship...

My legal council suggested I fight this in court. My pocketbook suggested it wasn't a good investment and my heart said, I have other things to take on in life that matter more.

We signed the agreement that day in November...and in one move I let my daughter go...but got her back!

The 4 of us decided to walk in downtown Montreal and go for Sushi...we all suggested Sushi for lunch for some reason...(I still find that uncanny)...but anyway we walked and couldn't find anywhere for Sushi...so we went to Mike's Italian instead. I got re-connected with Jordyn (that's her name) and my ex-wife and her husband...and lunch was awesome.

When it was time for us to leave, we all hugged eachother and acknowledged that this day, we had peace finally and a new appreciation for one another as being a part of our daughters life in some way. I personally want to set a good example...like I do anyway in my life.

Since then we've seen eachother, emailed eachother, written and phoned eachother.

Lesson two. Have patience in life...it does all work out.

Lesson three. Walk proudly no matter what...it's just a state of affairs and you can shine no matter what.

I am so proud of what happened that day in November. The profound transformation that occured...relationships healed.

I can honestly say, that I saw no possibility in this situation. I was resigned to a life of it never, ever getting better. But it did. It was to me a miracle!

I can also write you and say, that my daughter is awesome, pretty, wise and smart. That my ex-wife did a fantastic job and that she too is pretty amazing. Jordyn's new chosen dad is a good guy too...but there is one thing...they are all Montreal Canadians fans...oh well, you can't have it all now can you?

The bottom line is stay with it. Stay true, be proud. I wasn't the same person that left that marriage the day I re-connected with my ex-wife and daughter...I had grown, learned, was humbled and had survived. Don't ever give up hope and pray...(alot)...good things will happen, I assure you!

Article 2:

My best client:

My next story...is about a client. I can't name names though...Sometimes as a coach working in the non-profit field where clients are assigned to you whether you want them or not. So last year in 2006 I met (Robert...not his real name)...Robert was nice young man and in the high tech business. There was however a slight challenge with Robert. He had a learning difficulty. I never asked about this and I never asked Robert about it either, but it was obvious there were some challenges. Plus he was painstakingly shy and not a "people" person.

So there I was...my first meeting with Robert and I am so in my head about working with him. I went through doubt, fear, worry...a broad range of negative emotions...and it really impacted me just being there for my client. My major concern then was "How on earth can I help this guy"? "How am I possibly going to make a difference"? Worse is I know nothing compared to him about technology...the guy ran circles around me.

I had the soft skills, that he lacked and he had the technical skills that I lacked.

Then I got informed that I would be coaching Robert for the next 18 months or more...I really felt off about this. Still wondering how I would make a difference, if I could reach him, help him grow his business.

After a few months I found that if you're just ok with the fear and the negative emotions and you just do you very best on each meeting, that you give your best ideas and advice, that you listen, that you learn ...that everything should be ok.

Now fast forward to 2 weeks ago. I had my last meeting with Robert...and was no longer going to be his business coach, he would be assigned to a new coach for the remaining 4 months as I was moving on from that organization. In that meeting we had the best learning come forth and I got a chance to wish Robert well in his path.

The same day of our meeting we both attended a networking event and as the event drew to a close, Robert came up to me and asked to see if I would continue on as his business advisor somehow.

What a total joy that was to hear. It's not easy for him to express his feelings like that...but by asking to retain me somehow, even though I was leaving the organization, was like hearing music from heaven. Through all my fears, worries, and concerns...I connected with Robert.

My bottom line advice is just be your best, listen, go the extra mile (we'd coach by phone too plenty of times) communicate your fears openly and be open with your clients...Work on being supportive in your business relationships and hold your clients in high esteem...even though they might not for themselves.

More than money...Robert paid me very, very well with what he asked of me. What a joyous experience.

Until next time...make it happen in your business.

Best Regards/David Cohen

Oh and this month we have a treat...downloaded a video from Metacafe dot com and this should leave you with a little inspiration this time out!

Enjoy!

David